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Writer's picturePhoebe Train

_Cyborg Diary_

As someone who has grown up on the internet, mastering new technological tools at a young age that my parents struggled to understand, I have been fascinated by the way technology has rapidly advanced, causing major effects on society for better and for worse. Whilst acknowledging the positives, it’s important to note that all are concerned with the reduction of time, instantaneity; increasing the speed of transferring information, objects and people. But how fast can time move before we run out? How far can technology go before we've used all our resources? Are we advancing society or pushing humanity to the brink?





Entry #1 T - 10 days


Before she died, mum once said to me, 'Alice, writing is the most powerful tool', probably some misunderstanding of Nelson Mandela's statement claiming education to be the most powerful weapon, but of course, she knew very little about the mind of her daughter and the things a ‘powerful tool’ could achieve. The act of writing provides the ability to communicate concepts and emotions where spoken language fails us, whether it is an email, a poem or a text message - very powerful tools indeed. In today’s world, one that is far removed from anything that mum could ever fathom, the act of putting pen to paper is rendered to redundancy, whilst the rendering of files and data has taken over; a simple yet crucial transformation to the advancement of our society. Father tells me every day that 'knowledge is power', and I often question how he would know such a thing with the limitations of a human mind. My tendency to outwit father nowadays doesn't sit well with him. Sometimes I wonder if he ever regrets his tireless studies into computer engineering, or his experimentations with bionic replacements; maybe sometimes he wishes he had a normal job, in an office with coffee and tea breaks, although in that case, it would have only been a matter of time before he was jobless. But in life, there are some things you simply cannot undo, no command-Z shortcut, and some things that are fatally necessary. It's at times like these I miss my mother and her softness, her ability to see the world and everything in it as a connected whole, to see me as a part of her. And so, it is for you mother, in an attempt to restore my part of you, before almost everything I know to be you is gone, I type.


>>> SLEEP MODE __ ACITVATED >>>




Entry #2 T – 9 days


I woke up today as I wake up every day. Removing the charging pads from my temples always gives me a sense of relief. I went downstairs to find father watching the news, as he usually does, with his pensive but somewhat glazed stare, showing interest alongside boredom towards the repetitive news report on climate disasters worldwide. Images and videos of ‘Save The Planet’ rioters, burning plastic and smashing windows of Parliament to gain the attention of a government who remains anonymous, recluse of society in fear of assassination, were flashed on the screen. Before even saying good morning, father started to give me the same old lecture on why it is “completely necessary” for human eradication, allowing the cybo-humans to “resurface the earth in abundance and live a sustainable, green life”. A concept clearly unimaginable to the average human, sustainability is crucial for survival and existence, particularly in a world that is being driven to its end; so yes, the eradication of humanity is a necessity, a fatal necessity.

Early phases of eradication have been underway for longer than I have been alive, only upon my existence has the ability to speed up the process been a possibility. Phase 1, unbeknown to the inventors, was initiated in the late 1700’s, seeing the employment of machines in factories in order to produce their desired product more efficiently and economically - a beautiful example of the human-machine co-existence. In the following decades this same idea saw a swift development with no signs of stopping, replacing human workers and labourers for automated machines, like those self-service tills; which now aren’t really self-serving at all; what, with the worldwide installation of robotic scanners and bag packers. Today, the human-machine co-existence is slowly merging into one being, the cybo-citizen, and almost every manual job has been replaced by the necessity of efficiency and desire for speed, concluding Phase 1 – Redundancy – as complete.

This Phase creates the domino effect, initiating Phase 2 – Economic Collapse – marking the beginning of the selection process. In short, those who have enough money to survive, will…for a time. Those who have nothing but their redundant job to live off will not: survival of the richest. Money is essential for re-civilisation. Those in the highest brackets of economy have automatically been granted access to the cybo-age, since their earnings have been apprehended for future distribution throughout cybolisation. Selected civilians will undergo a series of tests followed by a range of surgical modifications suitable to their personal assets and abilities, ensuring loyalty and advancement within our cybo-society. The first instalment is obligatory, a single, micro-sized chip much like my own – the cybo-chip – inserted into the brain stem via a short surgical procedure. Once all subjects have been fitted these chips will self-activate, commencing re-civilisation whilst simultaneously connecting all members of cybo-society across the globe, reshaping the meaning of connection.

I cannot disagree with the necessity of human eradication, and I’m lucky that I am in a position to think this way. When she was alive, mum would always emphasise the importance of compassion in a world full of hatred, and whilst I am reminded of her through the ‘powerful tool’ of writing, I also must remember…

Control is power.


>>> PHASE ONE <<<___COMPLETE___<<<

>>> PHASE TWO <<<___INITIATED___>>>___67% COMPELTE___<<<

>>> SLEEP MODE __ ACITVATED >>>




Entry #3 T - 8 days


Today was the first day at my last posting, Victoria High, a very traditional school to say the least, certainly not too comfortable with the cyborg-concept. I woke with a sense of relief but couldn’t shake my exhaustion. Moving schools to run away from my identity is a demeaning part of my position. Sometimes I wish I attended school like all the other kids, with the need to learn, freedom to make friends, so I could fall in love and then hate the ones who made me cry. But I’m not like the other kids, never have been. I’ve never truly understood my place within society or if I even have one at all. Father always tells me that I’m special and so did mum, but I know every other parent told their chid a similar thing – that still doesn’t make me the same, I’ll never be the same.

My day began with a warning; more protests and riots filled the screen this morning, and when I saw dads face all I could detect was uncontaminated fear.


“Riots have broken out for the third time this week. At approximately 11 pm last night the East London Tech City was targeted, causing major disruptions around the Silicon Roundabout. Protesters say this is in retaliation to the thousands of job losses, resulting in poverty and the deaths of millions nationwide.”


The people in the photos were holding signs and banners with ‘cyborg freaks’, ‘to hell with the borgs!’ and ‘switch them off’ roughly spray-painted in rupture and rage. I took all of this as a reminder to stay low, keep quiet and complete your mission. Despite my utter boredom ‘reading’ through the same Pride and Prejudice edition that I could accurately recite at the age of 5, my first day wasn’t too bad.

The iLens father had built me makes the selection process much easier and a whole lot faster. With this, I have no risk of being caught taking DNA samples from potential subjects, which has always caused awkward and dangerous situations. Father also emphasises the fact that I don’t even have to speak to anyone, but part of the fun was getting to know people through small talk and whispered chats at the back of the classroom; I was told conversation is safer to avoid. The lens effectively does all the work for me, I just focus on a subject and if their political views, economic stability and physical ability fit the criteria of the higher powers, a green light will outline their figure. The only thing I then have to do is send the information via IoT to the higher powers for acceptance or rejection. One small little benefit I get to reap being the first of my kind is the ability to scroll through the log of accepted cybo-citizen's, seeing what modifications have been assigned to everyone. It’s almost like counting sheep; cold, hard, mechanic sheep.

>>> SELECTION PROCESS <<< ___ 95% COMPLETE ___<<<

>>> TRANSFERING DATA >>> ___ COMPLETE ___ <<<

>>> SLEEP MODE __ ACITVATED <<<




Entry #4 T – 7 days


When I went downstairs this morning dad was passed out on the sofa and The Fault In Our Stars was on the screen; it had been playing on repeat all night. He was holding a picture of mum tight against his chest and I felt my heart ache. Even with access to the whole dictionary in every language I still could not find the words to express the pain of losing someone so irreplaceably important, to an illness still incurable in today’s world. I still struggle to understand that. Father must really miss mum; I can’t imagine how it must feel to have lost such a strong connection with someone. I suppose we’re lucky, as cybo-humans, that we’ll have the ability to stay connected, wherever we are, through sickness and in health, not even in death will we part.

In geography class today I was desperately scanning the room for potential cybo-members, but given the shared political standpoint of students in this particular institution it wasn’t easy – all I saw was red. Then, one student came in late and sat right next to me – green.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Name___Benjamin Rig___

A g e___18____

Background___Offspring of Mr Rig, CEO of OILIKEIT____£78.5 Income____

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

I found it highly ironic and somewhat hysterical that his father was the CEO of an oil company and his son was the only green candidate in the class. Not Jemima Bines, who’s mum is the director of the London Array offshore wind farm, nor Bailey Waters, who’s dad studies marine life conservation. But of course, it’s about the money; always has been, always will be. And with that, I sent off the information.

We were told to get into pairs and discuss the various ways in which the climate has altered in the last 10 years, and given that he was sat next to me, Benjamin was my partner. Of course, I knew far more about climate change than anyone in that classroom, for various reasons, and what’s more, I was fully aware of the consequences of everyone’s wasteful and convenient lifestyles…so I let Benjamin speak. What took me by surprise is that he knew a lot about the changing climate, and what should have to been done to prevent it. I detected passion within him, which somehow turned into my own. When he was speaking, I completely zoned out and found myself admiring his beauty. It was as though he had been manufactured to perfection, following a strict set of instructions, or better yet, handcrafted by natural design. At that point, I started to hear my heart thud uncontrollably, and each pump sent electrical surges throughout my whole body, embarrassingly causing my left eye to twitch. To avoid potential exposure, I apologised and left for the bathroom.

Nothing like this had ever happened before; certainly no electrical pulses through my body, but most definitely no emotions strong enough to result in it. It made me feel vulnerable. The only kind of love I have ever been exposed to has been maternal, platonic, innocent and light. Nothing this intense, the only intensity I know is that feeling of the charging pads on my temples - which I haven’t used in a while - draining and filling my brain with endless amounts of data. Was it love or fear I felt? Fear of the unknown? Isn’t it funny how I can detect others feelings, but never fully understand my own…


>>> SELECTION PROCESS <<< ___ 98% COMPLETE ___<<<

>>> TRANSFERING DATA >>> ___ COMPLETE ___ <<<

>>> CHARGING PADS ___ CONNECTED ___ RECEIVING DATA ___ >>>

>>> SLEEP MODE __ ACITVATED ___ <<<




Entry #5 T – 6 days


I could hear dad listening to a heated debate this morning on the ethics of artificial pregnancies. One very irritated lady stated, “the manner of birth will influence the manner of life”, arguing for the prohibition of artificial wombs and alike technologies that will “cause the end of human race as we know it”. Dad turned off the radio when he heard me coming down the stairs; he forgets that the chip he installed into my brain can pick up radio waves, and any waves at that. Although, of course, that was never its intention. I can’t decide if it’s amazing or terrifying, how technology can move so far from what was intended of it; terrifyingly amazing seems most suitable.

I saw Benjamin today and it might be the last time I do before he’s taken and held in quarantine. When he saw me, he smiled. I can only hope he’s just as happy once he realises that he’s been granted access to the cybo-age. I’m glad I underwent the procedure when I was too young to understand anything, I can imagine it to be quite traumatic otherwise. In a biology class today, I finally selected the final few subjects before sending their information. The class was on the reproductive system, a topic that causes havoc within a hormone ridden classroom at the best of times. But in an oddly refreshing yet uncomfortable turn, this class erupted into a highly flammable political debate. The first exercise was to weigh up the pro’s and con’s of natural childbirth and ectogenesis. The overruling opinion in this class was clearly right-winged, which I had already seen by the lack of green subjects across the school. Those few that spoke in favour of ectogenesis were ‘cyborg arse licker’s’, spurring hushed conversations of redundancies and homelessness. To avoid these slurs, I kept quiet.

It made me question who I would be, had I been birthed out of my mother’s womb, rather than conceived in a tube, nurtured in silicone then spat out onto an operating table and thrown under a knife. All before I could even let out my first cry. I was never really made out of love, was I. I was born out of a necessity, out of a greed and desire for efficiency and money. I am eternally grateful for my parents; they’ve given me a life I am sure many others like me would never have known. I just can’t help but feel a disconnection from them, like an old, useless WiFi router, or a bad phone signal, stranded alone in the hills. Despite the eradication of humanity as everyone knows it, the pain and sadness it will probably cause, I’m eager to feel a connection with someone. Who knows, maybe Ben and I will find each other in the next lifetime. I hope we do.


>>> SELECTION PROCESS <<< ___COMPLETE___ <<<

>>> PHASE TWO <<< ___COMPLETE___ <<<

>>> TRANSFERING DATA >>> ___COMPLETE___ <<<

>>> CHARGING PADS ___CONNECTED___TRANSFERING DATA___ >>>

>>> INITIATION OF PHASE 3 <<<___BUFFERING…___>>>

>>> SLEEP MODE __ ACTIVATED ___ <<<



Entry #6 T – 5 days





Low battery is red

Good connection is blue

Selection is natural

And that’s why I chose you.


Your mind must be pure

Your brain is perfect

If the time is not now,

Very soon we will connect.


With arms strong like yours

There’s no need for bionic

And your love to me

Will be my only tonic.




Entry #7 T – 4 days


Today, we are one step closer to our end goal, one step closer to ultimate connection. The initiation of Phase 3 – IoT Cyber Control – was somewhat successful…maybe too much so. It is only now, through typing, I can reflect on the events that unfolded before me, filling me with guilt and self hate. But I know that this is for the better, for our planet, for our future

Once I received the green signal from the higher powers, I was granted permissions to the IoT, giving me access to every control in the country, from Home Automation Systems to Medical Healthcare, IoMT. I was instructed to conduct a series of breaches, disabling all manual and automatic devices connected to the IoT, giving me the most powerful tool; to re-write the country’s fate. This Phase ensured the eradication of the weakest. The instructions from the higher powers were simple:

>>> Maximise drug dosage

>>> Reduce oxygen levels

>>> Lock doors in homes

>>> Increase levels of heating

But comprehending these orders, and initiating them, was far from simple. At this point I had to disconnect myself from myself and follow through with my mission. I must have strayed too far from my mind. Instead of increasing the levels of heating in homes, I increased the speed of automated trains, causing catastrophic damage along with the deaths of thousands more than planned. The higher powers had tapped into my cybo-chip, allowing me to hear instructions in private. To my surprise, I was congratulated on my error and that concluded Phase 3. I was left knowing I had single handedly obliterated the lives and families of thousands. When I went downstairs, dad was watching the TV. Breaking news had been released announcing the world was under a cyber attack, warning families and individuals to disconnect their automated devices and avoid staying alone. But the damage had already been done.

I found comfort in the fact that this was also happening across the globe, and I was not the only one who had to live with this burden. I wonder if any of the other cybo’s consider this a burden…


>>> PHASE ONE <<<___COMPLETE___<<<

>>> PHASE TWO <<<___COMPLETE___<<<

>>> PHASE THREE <<<___COMPLETE___<<<

>>> TRANSFERING DATA >>> ___ COMPLETE ___ <<<

>>> CHARGING PADS <<< ___ C0NNECTI0NERR0R ___ ERR0R L0ADING DATA<<<

>>> SLEEP MODE __ ACTIVATED ___ <<<




Entry #8 T – 3 days


I woke up this morning in complete silence. The only sound I could hear was the high-pitched ringing between my ears, which I put down to stress and eventually, eased off when I removed the charging pads. I went downstairs to no news on the screen, no debates on the radio; nothing but a piece of paper on the kitchen table. Dad had left a scribbled note explaining he was urgently needed in the labs regarding an issue with the cybo-chips and reminded me that today was Phase 4 of eradication – Communication Collapse. He signed off the note with a ‘love you’, before reminding me not to do anything radical; but I wondered what he meant by that. Phase 4 guaranteed complete control over worldwide communication; sending the planet into a digital blackout. No access to Wi-Fi, data or signal, in turn bringing the whole of humanity to a stand still. But something unsettling happened when the higher powers were instructing me through the process.

Everything was going smoothly, once I had disconnected telecommunication systems, I was ordered to disconnect all WiFi and data signals coming in and going out of the country, eradicating the Internet. Before I continued, I was warned that once all communication had been seized, I would be required to wear my charging pads in order to activate the cybo-chips. I was certain it was way too early for activation, but I didn’t question it. Surely, they knew what they’re doing. I closed my eyes and followed the final command, but I was disconnected.

As per instruction I must sign off, for now, to allow for activation of the cybo-chips. I’m thinking of you, Benjamin, and you, dad. And always of you mum, I hope I made you proud.


>>> PHASE ONE <<<___COMPLETE___<<<

>>> PHASE TWO <<<___COMPLETE___<<<

>>> PHASE THREE <<<___COMPLETE___<<<

>>> PHASE FOUR <<<___COMPLETE___<<<

>>> TRANSFERING DATA >>> ___ COMPLETE ___ <<<

>>> CHARGING PADS <<< ___ C0NnECTI0NERRO]0R ___ ERr0R LO[0ADING DAtA<<<___ERRO.0R_R-ECEIVING_DaTa___>>>>

>>>__CHIP_ACTIVATION_CODE_0100201010002010022011010__FAILED__<<<

>>>__CHIP_ACTIVATION_FAILED_ERRORCODE_101____<<<

>>>__CHIP_MALFUNCTION_ERRORCODE_201_REASON_MAJOR_SOFTWARE_<<<

>>>__CHIP_SHTDN_OPERATINGSYSTEM_MAJOR_0x0000018__<<<

>>>__CHIP_SHTDN_REASON_MAJOR_POWER_0x000600000__<<<


>>>__CHIP_SELF_DESTRUCT_PERMISSION_GRANTED_ACTIVATED__<<<

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